In my last post I talked about training for the Rugged Maniac, my first 5k obstacle race. In truth, I wish I had trained harder, but only for myself, not because of the race.
It was amazing and fun, but the lines for the obstacles really slowed things down. More like a stroll with obstacles than a race. I think we finished the 5k in about an hour. No one was really worried about time.
Turns out, I am super good at climbing over solid objects! Ultimately climbing 4 and 8 foot walls is not the insurmountable challenge I was afraid it would be. I wish there were 4 and 8 foot barriers all over the place that I would need to climb as a matter of course in my daily life. Like in the middle of the sidewalks and around Prospect Park. Traversing the city would be way more fun (Obviously this would not be ideal for the disabled and elderly… and parents of young children I guess, or people with groceries to carry… OK never mind let’s just move on.)
The ninja escape and the ringer (the thing where you jump from one angled platform to another, one foot per wall and the rings you swing from across a water trap) were challenging. I almost made it on the ninja thing. I made it only two rings on the ringer, but that is one more than I expected. There was no fire (good, I was not feelin’ that fire thing anyway.)
Crawling through the mud under the wires was challenging mostly because it was mud that smelled terrible and seemed to be made of broken glass and grit, but it was fine.
That said, there was one obstacle I REALLY failed to overtake successfully. While I sailed over the wooden barriers and Jacob’s ladders and cargo nets, the inflatable wall took me down. When I went to their website to try to find what they call this monstrosity it wasn’t even in their list of obstacles, but it was about 8 feet and inflatable with handles on one side only. Anyway, I was struggling to get over this damn thing, and one of the red shirt guys who are there to help attempted to “help” me over… Let’s just say it was not a graceful landing.
By the time I got to the next obstacle there was blood streaming down my arm and dripping from my fingers. It didn’t really hurt and I decided to continue if they would let me. I asked another red shirt, a girl who had to be 19 or 20, and she looked horrified and said she had no idea what to do. So I took her bottle of Aquafina and poured it over my arm and ran away from her before she could decide to stop me. I climbed the cargo nets and made my way to the finish, where my teammates and I went down a 50 foot waterslide into a pool of utterly filthy water. It was great.
After we rinsed off I went to the medical tent where a handsome man sprayed my wound with hydrogen peroxide and then what he said was a “liquid bandage” but felt more like mace. That was the only time it really hurt. My elbow seems to be healing well, although my mother seems to think it is going to turn into a staph or MRSA infection and I will need to have the whole arm amputated. I’ve been sending her a photo a day of the healing process but I will spare you all because it looks much more disgusting now than when it happened.
I think I’ll do it again next year, and not to worry, all my tattoos are fine!